Everybody Wanna Go Viral: Adjusting your expectations of success

Everybody Wanna Go Viral: Adjusting your expectations of success

Going viral has become a culture in itself.  It seems to be the goal of most people on social media. If they can only do something crazy so that The Shade Room or BallerAlert will repost…I can take off.  Millions of shares.  Celebrities reposting. The goal isn’t to be successful…but to be seen.

Instant success has become the new American Dream.  Bump the white picket fence, I want to get millions of followers overnight.  Put in work for a good week and then I will be rubbing elbows with the big wigs.

This new view of success doesn’t stop at social media post.  It has infected our minds.  All that we want to achieve in life must happen *snap* like that.  Quick, fast, and in a hurry.  If I start a blog, it’s a must to have at least a 100 thousand viewers by the end of the week.  If not, then well I will to point fingers at all of my friends who are not sharing my content…I’m supposed to be poppin’ right now! At work they don’t appreciate me.  I have been an employee for 5 minutes and they haven’t promoted me to senior leadership.  They tripping! Let me go look for a new job.

I know you may feel that I exaggerated with those example, but honestly that is how some of us sound.  This culture of going “viral” has conditioned us that success happens overnight.  But let me be the one to bust your bubble...

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27...Year of the Slump

27...Year of the Slump

It wasn’t happening.  The words were not forming in my brain and onto  paper.  It was the weekend before J-Day (what I call my birthday...if you didn’t know by now) and I was at a loss for words.  It has become tradition for me to share my insights of what the last year taught me.  As I reflected on 27, nothing clicked for me.  

The next day at work I do what I always do when I am stuck.  Pay my co-worker Kelley a visit.  For some reason random conversations with her birth new ideas (it worked last year so why not?).  But this time, nothing happened.  There was  no moment where I had to run back to my desk to write down my thoughts.  The aha moment wasn’t there.  I returned back to my desk how I arrived…with empty thoughts.

At this point I started to become frustrated.  It never takes me this long to think of topics to write about.  Especially my birthday! I am with myself 24/7, this should be a breeze.  This is usually the post that I wait in anticipation to write, who doesn’t like to talk about themselves?

But I had one more stop on the struggle bus before I gave up…

 

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Are you waiting on tragedy?

Are you waiting on tragedy?

Thoughts of what we should do seem to linger in our heads.  But why does it take an act of God for us to move on it. 

In my previous job I knew that it wasn’t the career for me.  I recognized that I needed to part ways but I became comfortable in my misery.  I wanted more.  It wasn’t until I was fired that I was forced to search for happiness in my life.

My health was never a concern for me.  French fries, chicken nuggets and pizza were my diet.  I knew that I needed to change my lifestyle because of the health conditions that plagued my family.   But how can you resist Chick fi la and Domino's (ESPECIALLY now that their large pizzas are only 7.99).  It took the untimely death of my Uncle, and my brother’s medical stare to lead me to take my health seriously.

….and don’t even get me started on relationships (I’ll save that for a later date).

Life has a way of placing us on a roller-coaster filled with twist and turns.  We never expect to receive this, it just happens.  And when it does it shows us life through another pair of lenses.  A new point of view.  What we once pondered about must happen, no longer waiting, fear doesn’t matter, push ego out the way, life is too short and we must act NOW!

You live life with NO LIMITS!

But why do we have to be forced? What would happen if you just acted on it and life didn’t have to pull your teeth to get it done?

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My Facebook friends don't want me to be great: When no one is liking your social media post

My Facebook friends don't want me to be great: When no one is liking your social media post
“Whenever I create a ratchet post or meme it gets 100 likes and tons of shares.  But let me post something about my business and it may receive 5 likes.  Can’t get no love posting anything positive smh.”

If I log onto social media and run across another post like this I might scream!

*Logs on to Facebook*

Before I am the kettle calling the pot black.  I must admit when I launched this site those were some of my thoughts.  It is common sense.  If someone rocks with you, why wouldn’t they show your new endeavor love?

In theory that sounds nice.  However we place expectations on people who may careless.  And expectations only lead to disappointment.  We believe that our Social Media “friends” and family are obligated to support our new adventure.  Then when we launch and it doesn’t happen what do we do? Let’s take a look to why your new idea isn’t receiving any social media love.

Aiming at the wrong target

Everyone isn’t going to like your product.  And they shouldn’t. Instead of selling and promoting to the masses, create a target market.  This is the niche population that CRAVES for your product.  People may not react because IT ISN’T FOR THEM. Why continue to cram it down their throats? The piece of the puzzle just doesn’t fit.  If you attempt to reach everyone you will continue to hear crickets.

 

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What an Absentee Father Taught me about Forgiveness

What an Absentee Father Taught me about Forgiveness

Father’s Day 2017.

I found myself wasting time procrastinating after church on social media.  Though I had plenty of writing to complete I wasn’t quite in the mood to deal with my tasks.  Scrolling through social media I came across hundreds of people sharing photos of them and their fathers.  It was accompanied with long paragraphs of how grateful they were to have him in their life. 

It was a great site to see but I couldn’t take looking at them any longer.  I closed my social media for the day.  A touch of envy filled my body.  My experience was different and I couldn’t relate to the feeling of having a standup man as their father.  The closest figure that I had was my big brother who is 16 years older than me.  He filled the role though it wasn’t in his job description.

The relationship with my father leaves me with memories of empty promises.  “I’ma do better baby.”  Only to follow the role to a script he wrote 27 years ago.  Birthday cards sent with the incorrect ages and promises of visits and toys that never came. 

What hurt most was that he has four children but I was the only one he made a choice not to be active in their life.  My three sisters have stories of how he is the father of the year.  In the meantime, I was left wondering if he was real or just a figment of my imagination. 

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27 Year Old Brace Face: Never too old to get what you want

27 Year Old Brace Face: Never too old to get what you want

My family is straight outta South Carolina and hella country.   Not quite The Hillbilly’s but they possess many of the same qualities.  Never went to the doctor because Cod Liver Oil cures all, eating parts of random animals that you should never eat (a soup made out of pig's brain...REALLY) and the worse of all the process of pulling a tooth. 

I wished that my grandma followed the movies and how cool they made it look; you know tie a string around the tooth and attach it to a door.  But no, she would tilt your head back with a forceful left hand while wiggling the tooth with her right.  I use wiggle very lightly.  She used all her strength and if it wasn’t loose she pretty much made it.  If tooth only gave the slightest budge she would say “this tooth is loose.”

THIS WAS NOT GOOD NEWS!

Instead of allowing the tooth to naturally fall out; she would firmly grasp it, twist it ONE good time and YANK it out of your mouth (give me a second, I’m having PTSD just thinking about it).

I concluded that I was NOT about this life and put together a plan.  Anytime a tooth was about to come out I wouldn’t say a word and kept my grandmother far away from checking my mouth.  While it cured my fears.  It also created a problem.  My teeth weren’t coming out on their own.  This caused my teeth to grow on top of each other. 

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Just take the step: 3 ways to disempower fear

Just take the step: 3 ways to disempower fear

“Jas can you just do it for me?”

This is a phrase that I would soon become annoyed with.  I was at my former part-time gig and my co-worker’s son decided to keep me company at the front desk.  He was always entertaining and dramatic so we got along well.  It also helped the time go by.  As he was updating me on life as a high school student (which mostly involved, girls, girls, girls, and sports) I pulled out an apple.  While watching me eat, the hungry Gods hit his spirit. 

“Let me get one?”

Unfortunate for him it was the only one that I had.  However, I knew the plug.  The boxing coach had a lifetime supply of snacks in his office. 

Go ask Coach.  He got all the snacks.  He doesn’t mind, just gotta go ask him.

You would’ve thought I told him to go into an Iraq war zone by himself.  For the next two hours, I had to suffer through his “I’m sooo hungrrry” pleas.  It was too late.  I had not an ounce of sympathy.  I already told him exactly what he needed to do.  All he had to do was go ask the coach for snacks and he would’ve been good to go.

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