Posts tagged life lessons
27...Year of the Slump

It wasn’t happening.  The words were not forming in my brain and onto  paper.  It was the weekend before J-Day (what I call my birthday...if you didn’t know by now) and I was at a loss for words.  It has become tradition for me to share my insights of what the last year taught me.  As I reflected on 27, nothing clicked for me.  

The next day at work I do what I always do when I am stuck.  Pay my co-worker Kelley a visit.  For some reason random conversations with her birth new ideas (it worked last year so why not?).  But this time, nothing happened.  There was  no moment where I had to run back to my desk to write down my thoughts.  The aha moment wasn’t there.  I returned back to my desk how I arrived…with empty thoughts.

At this point I started to become frustrated.  It never takes me this long to think of topics to write about.  Especially my birthday! I am with myself 24/7, this should be a breeze.  This is usually the post that I wait in anticipation to write, who doesn’t like to talk about themselves?

But I had one more stop on the struggle bus before I gave up…

 

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Are you waiting on tragedy?

Thoughts of what we should do seem to linger in our heads.  But why does it take an act of God for us to move on it. 

In my previous job I knew that it wasn’t the career for me.  I recognized that I needed to part ways but I became comfortable in my misery.  I wanted more.  It wasn’t until I was fired that I was forced to search for happiness in my life.

My health was never a concern for me.  French fries, chicken nuggets and pizza were my diet.  I knew that I needed to change my lifestyle because of the health conditions that plagued my family.   But how can you resist Chick fi la and Domino's (ESPECIALLY now that their large pizzas are only 7.99).  It took the untimely death of my Uncle, and my brother’s medical stare to lead me to take my health seriously.

….and don’t even get me started on relationships (I’ll save that for a later date).

Life has a way of placing us on a roller-coaster filled with twist and turns.  We never expect to receive this, it just happens.  And when it does it shows us life through another pair of lenses.  A new point of view.  What we once pondered about must happen, no longer waiting, fear doesn’t matter, push ego out the way, life is too short and we must act NOW!

You live life with NO LIMITS!

But why do we have to be forced? What would happen if you just acted on it and life didn’t have to pull your teeth to get it done?

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What an Absentee Father Taught me about Forgiveness

Father’s Day 2017.

I found myself wasting time procrastinating after church on social media.  Though I had plenty of writing to complete I wasn’t quite in the mood to deal with my tasks.  Scrolling through social media I came across hundreds of people sharing photos of them and their fathers.  It was accompanied with long paragraphs of how grateful they were to have him in their life. 

It was a great site to see but I couldn’t take looking at them any longer.  I closed my social media for the day.  A touch of envy filled my body.  My experience was different and I couldn’t relate to the feeling of having a standup man as their father.  The closest figure that I had was my big brother who is 16 years older than me.  He filled the role though it wasn’t in his job description.

The relationship with my father leaves me with memories of empty promises.  “I’ma do better baby.”  Only to follow the role to a script he wrote 27 years ago.  Birthday cards sent with the incorrect ages and promises of visits and toys that never came. 

What hurt most was that he has four children but I was the only one he made a choice not to be active in their life.  My three sisters have stories of how he is the father of the year.  In the meantime, I was left wondering if he was real or just a figment of my imagination. 

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Surrendering to Celibacy: 3 lessons learned from sacrifice

I was in the mist of my valley. 

You know the point in my story where I was broke, unemployed and refusing to leave my apartment…yeah that part. 

But during that time I was entering year 3 of my situationship.  For all of you with great relationships that think that was a typo; it is actually a thing.  This is the point where you’re not together per se (you got a man? Nah I’m single) but your actions SCREAM relationship (arguing, fussing, and fighting like y'all together).  It’s a relationship without an ounce of commitment; we had our issues but that was my boo.

We had been together for a while but something weird began to happen and it was the first time that I experience this feeling.  I was on my way home from his place and I was having a heart to heart to God about my life situation.  I felt as though I had been in this low place for a while and nothing was shaking for me.  I was looking for him to do something DRASTIC in my life.  Not quite turn water into wine but maybe pop a job in my inbox or do some magic to my bank account. 

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5 lessons that Beyoncé taught us in lemonade

So if someone could send the Ushers to my house to cover me with the cloth because ya girl is LAID OUT after watching Lemonade.  Did Beyoncé just give you your whole entire life with that visual or what? Chile…….. Days later and I am still picking up my edges off of the floor. 

The Beyhive and everyone else, patiently waiting in anticipation for a new album since the SuperBowl performance and since the announcement of the Formation Tour. Many of us have bought tickets to the concert (…me included) with the thoughts that we would be booty bouncin’ to Single Ladies once again….Bey where is this ALBUM girl! Then out of nowhere she drops a trailer for an HBO special for Lemonade. 

I don’t know about y’all but if you were anything like me; I thought I would need some Holy water to sprinkle on my TV from the preview are some voodoo curse would invade my apartment.  It was nothing that we could have imagined and nothing short of amazing; from the storytelling to the visuals Beyoncé kept us engaged the entire hour, five minutes, and twenty-two seconds.  Through it all, we can learn a thing or two on how to sip lemonade every day…. 

There is no doubt that Beyoncé is in a league of her own; seriously who else has the ability to do numbers on a tour without even dropping new music? Not only that but to premiere the visual album on a major paid network such as HBO; which continues to separate her from the pack.  In our jobs, businesses, or schools how many times have we followed the crowd and then surprised that we don’t stand out from the pack.  How can you challenge yourself to do something different that will take you to the next level? 

1.       Dare to be different

There is no doubt that Beyoncé is in a league of her own; seriously who else has the ability to do numbers on a tour without even dropping new music? Not only that but to premiere the visual album on a major paid network such as HBO; which continues to separate her from the pack.  In our jobs, businesses, or schools how many times have we followed the crowd and then surprised that we don’t stand out from the pack.  How can you challenge yourself to do something different that will take you to the next level? 

2.       Use your influence

Influence [in-floo-uh ns]: noun; the capacity or power of persons or things to be a compelling force on or produce effects on the actions, behavior, opinion, etc., of others

Lemonade made us want to subscribe to HBO, make a 5th free trial to Tidal….and have you notice the comment section for anybody coming for Bey (the Beyhive plays NO games).  It all comes down to influence.  Many of us use ours in various ways and most of the time it does not have a positive effect; (…..to tear down other folks) generally because we feel as if our influence does not have a reach.  Whether you touch one person or millions, how can you channel your influence to put positivity  back into the universe or better yet make a change within your community?

 One of my favorite parts about Lemonade was during the “Freedom” performance where mothers’ of sons who have been affected by police brutality was highlighted.  She used her influence to highlight an ongoing issue of police brutality.

 

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