Posts tagged relationships
It Goes Down in the DM: How to get noticed in a saturated JOB market

Social media is filled with all type of features.  You can write on someone’s wall, share valuable content, but the feature with the highest stock is the …..INBOX (why you think you’re man won’t give you the password….hmmm).  Yo Gotti has made it that more acceptable to slide in someone’s DMs.  Why not see if your crush has the same feelings as you, never know if you don’t ask huh….. Shoot your shot right?  We will slide in and out all kinds of inboxes but what about the inbox of the hiring manager for a new job?

How many of us are not in the field that we would like to be in? 

In this day and age there are literally hundreds of people FIGHTING for that one position.  All we continue to do is…

Go online…

Fill out the application…..

Get rejected days later….

Go to the next job posting….

…..and do the same thing with the expectations to land the job.  When was the last time you tried a different approach to your job search? 

LinkedIn

LinkedIn is a platform to “manage your professional identity. Build and engage with your professional network. Access knowledge, insights and opportunities.” It is a social media beast for all things involving your career; you have the opportunity to post your resume, stay connected with your network, but my favorite is to see how my network is connected to folks that I want to get in contact with (you know, I have a friend of a friend of a friend that works at xyz).  When I ask people if they have a LinkedIn profile they either give me the dazed or created one and haven’t visited it since then. 

After a college professor had us create one in class one day; I did not use it to its fullest potential.  Instead I chopped it up to the fact that it wasn’t beneficial to me but in reality I did not take the time to learn HOW to use it.  At one point in life everything is a new experience, but it is up to us to educate ourselves on it. 

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5 Reasons you are successful and still single

Outside of fear there is one other topic that me and my girls ALWAYS find ourselves discussing….

MEN!

I mean we are a group of educated, career driven, shawty got her own, and we cannot forget beautiful women (melanin is poppin!).  Queens with a purpose and you guessed it, the majority of us are…..

….SINGLE.

With these qualities who wouldn’t want to take us off of the market.  But because the lack thereof it makes me ponder on the stereotypes about successful black woman.  You know them.  Black educated women are less likely to get married.  No man wants a woman that’s more successful than them…blah blah blah. 

But as an die hard optimistic I tend not to fall for statistics because even though the numbers show one thing a little faith can turn any theory on its back.   However the older I become and continue to notice the rise of single black woman on their grind I can’t help but to think……

Where are all the good men at?

(I know they out there hiding somewhere, if not “Say Yes to the Dress” would be cancelled by now).  So why are all these bossed up women still single?

1.       Same ole Same ole

Comfort zones are dangerous.  Like proceed with caution this can get really bad dangerous.  A couple months ago I shared how I am infatuated with my usual from Zaxby’s; you know the chicken finger plate, no cole slaw, extra fries, and teriyaki instead of Zax sauce.  It was to the point where I didn’t even have to glance at the menu because I dare not consider anything else. 

Does this remind you of your dating life?

If he is not dark chocolate with a beard and with a tailor suit on we won’t even bother to give our number out or curve him until the days end.  But what if the soulmate that God has for you doesn’t fit the mold that you have in your head; would you miss him right in front of your face?

But let me tell you one day I finally decided to try an Zalad at Zaxby’s

…..OHHHHHH…..MY……….GOSSSSH!!

 

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#OutHereLIVIN: 3 Ways To Live In The Moment

Last week was one of many emotions.  I found myself at the mountain top as I received some awesome news in regards to a couple projects that I have in process and don’t forget I was only days away from my arrival in Mexico.  That high seemed to crash when I found out that one of my High School basketball youngins had passed away after being in a car accident; like it couldn’t get any worse another High School classmate lost his life in a car accident only days later. Often times we recite the quote that “life is short” but it seems to be just words and the right thing to say until it hits home.  We always expect older folks to pass away but when those around our age young and filled with life fade away it gives us a wake up call that life is indeed short. 

After I finally stopped asking God why (somethings in life are not meant for us to understand); I came to the conclusion that I needed to live in the moment just a little bit more.  Even though I am living my dream out I have become consumed with it.  Always brainstorming my next plans, dissecting what I am doing, and perfecting my craft, literally my mind is always on the go with no window of break in sight. 

But how could I let out a breath of fresh air and live in the moment?

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"I'm educated but still like to do ratchet stuff": The struggle of living in your truth
“Sophistiratchet: A person of highly educated pedigree (academically socially and otherwise) fluent in various forms of public etiquette yet is equally knowledgeable of the latest trap music, updated on most prime time ratchet cable programs and conversant in the tongue of ratchet.”

I was strolling through Facebook bored one afternoon, and came across this post that included a word I never saw before…

…Sophistiratchet.

In that moment I lifted my head toward the heavens, as the clouds parted and Angels from heaven said “This word was created just for you!”  FINALLY, someone could describe me to THE tee…and as I shared with my girls we all agreed ….This was US!

We have been kickin’ it for a couple months now, so y’all know me pretty well.  As you know, I’m a nerd who loves to read books based on research.  I really think that Kanye West was talking about me in The College Dropout skit (you know Lil’ Jimmy’s daddy who just kept learning and learning; only to leave he son his degrees). 

But on the flip side, you can find me discussing why Amina and Tara keep messing with Peter Gunz, while Millie rocking on any block, and bank head bouncing to “I luh God, you don’t luh God, what’s wrong with you?” To call me one without acknowledging the other wouldn't give you a clear indication of who Jasamine Hill really is. 

Why is it that society forces us to choose one or the other? If you’re educated the thought of being hip is almost a foreign language, and if you have ratchet moments folks are surprised that you have degrees on deck (especially in the workplace).  How can we be ourselves and still coexist without the fear of being judged?

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"Coach I shot my shots!": What happens when we allow the crowd to decide our fate.....

So remember that time I told you all about how my college basketball career flopped (yea what happens when a dream is deferred). My whole life up to this point was geared towards making history of being the first woman in the NBA (a real life Monica from Love and Basketball).  I had prepared and trained for this moment my entire life and now my dream became reality when I packed my bags and went to college to be a part of the Women’s Basketball Team.  Hype was not even the word; I was like a celebrity the last day of High School “don’t forget about me when you make it big!” (I'll try not to......).  But once I stepped on campus and we had our first 5:45 am pre-season session things got real……REAL QUICK! (I really think I saw a sign that said welcome to hell...... all jokes aside).  I was shortest thing on the court standing tall at 5’3, I wasn’t the fastest, or the strongest, and confidence wasn’t the best but I had DRIVE.  But as the season would make it's start, the end of the bench became my bestfriend.  To see your dream being played out right in front of your face but slipping out of your hand will either make you work harder or drop the ball.  And once this situation started to unfold the choice was made……

The team was preparing to travel to East North Carolina to take on one of our conference rivals Elizabeth City State University.  This just wasn’t any ole school rivalry but a statement game.  You see our Head Coach previously coached there before she came to our school.  She wasn’t about to go to her old stomping grounds and lose.  You could sense it in the air without even looking at the schedule to know that the game was coming up.  The upper classmen warned us that practice was about to became OD! Got to make that free throw, every lay-up counts, nope that play wasn’t ran right get on the LINE! (I get tired by just talking about it). 

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Are You A Runaway Employee? The reason you are jumping from job to job

At first glance would you say that you are a runaway employee? (trick question, many of you already said no without even knowing what it mean). 

If the phrase was in the dictionary it would be defined as an individual who goes from job to job only to find themselves in the same predicament.  The Urban Dictionary maybe say; someone who is in denial that their ish stank so instead of looking in the mirror to fix the problem they search for other opportunities only to find themselves in the same place a couple months later; rather run than deal with the real issue.  

The “unhappiness” that we experience in the work place is the result of something that was initiated on our part; as every action has an equal or greater reaction.  If you go to work with the “I’m just here so I don’t get fired” attitude day in and day out; don’t be surprised when passed up for a promotion.  

Of course someone will ask why you didn’t get it and our response “management doesn’t like me” (Oh really…..please tell me more *side eye*).  I guess management hasn’t liked you in the last five jobs, and the next job will probably be no different.  Why is it that the first reaction is to RUN? Is the grass really greener on the other side?  It usually isn’t.  So let’s take a look to see what is causing our grass not to grow.

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